Eaglie's Aviary

Saturday, June 30, 2007

You Know Something's Wrong...

Next, I put in my LJ address:

Online Dating

This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:
* hell (3x)
* bastards (2x)
* gay (1x)

I guess I have to pick up some slack on The Aviary.

Also, gay?!?! Fucking fags.


I Know Dave Just Did This, But...

So I put in The Aviary's address into this website. It returned this automated response:

Online Dating

I suspect this might be a skewed, since it is only based on the front page. I haven't been fucking cursing lately.

This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:

* hell (7x)
* bitches (1x)

"Hell" seven times? That's a heck of a lot.


Friday, June 29, 2007

The Time of WoW Is Over

Now that my WoW account has run out, my bank account with it, I have to decide what game to play around with until I get itchy for another round of MMO'ing.

Diablo and KOTOR come to mind. Never finished the latter, and Diablo is just fun to explore. Perhaps there will even be a picture story?


Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Only Tommy Thompson Makes More Booger Jokes

Happy 1013, Aviary! Ironic after that Last Post, Right?

You may be wondering why I chose to celebrate Post #1013 and not #1000! Well, it's certainly not because I didn't notice until today that I passed up that thousandth and just kept posting anyway! Certainly not! It's not that reason, certainly!

I guess the biggest question is how bloggers celebrate 10001013 posts. I figure the best way to celebrate is always like famous people, which is why I'll be in rehab a week before my 21st birthday... but, really, that's a different story for the tabloids. What have my idols been up to?

Stop the ACLU
URL: http://www.stoptheaclu.com/
Who the Hell: An anti-American Civil Liberties Union blog, which, when put that way, really does sound like it's evil, doesn't it?
Celebration for #1000: Ate own first born.

Daily Kos
URL: http://www.dailykos.com/
Who the Hell: One of terribly many liberal blogs. I chose this specific one with a roulette wheel.
Celebration for #1000: Ate first born of random rich man (picked by roulette wheel).

Dave Barry's Blog
URL: http://weblog.herald.com/column/davebarry/
Who the Hell: The blog of the formerly very busy, now very lazy, newspaper columnist/humorist where he posts all the crazy news everyone sends him.
Celebration for #1000: There was this man in Sydney, Australia who exploded a toilet with a squirrel in it. The squirrel escaped unharmed and stole the man's wallet.

Grand Text Auto
URL: http://www.grandtextauto.gatech.edu/
Who the Hell: This is a scholarly blog, applying scholarship and various types of critiques to New Media (the Internet, video games, etc.)
Celebration for #1000: Posted ten new Wikipedia articles to which they had added information about New Media. BUT ALL THE TEXT WAS FORMATTED OFF CENTER!!! THOSE PRANKSTERS!!!

LDS Blogs
URL: http://www.mormon-blogs.com/
Who the Hell: The Mormon sector of the Blogosphere and a webring... believe me, I was as surprised as you are. (Learn more about the Bloggernacle Choir!)
Celebration for #1000: Got together and sang. Their MIDI rendition of Star-Spangled Banner was stirring.

Cute Overload
URL: http://www.cuteoverload.com/
Who the Hell: Almost as good as KittenWar
Celebration for #1000: Posted picture of kitten mewing.

I Can Has Cheezburger?
URL: http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/
Who the Hell: Almost good KittenWar as?
Celebration for #1000: Posted picture of kitten mewing, "1000 POSTS, BITCHES!"

Of course, I didn't have a 1000th post celebration! I'm having this one!

So why did I really choose this number, 1013? It does have a meaning, for your information, and perhaps some of you need a history lesson.

Ever heard of a little show called The X-Files? Did you know Mulder's apartment number was 1013? Did you know his birthday was 10/13? DID YOU KNOW HIS EYESIGHT WAS ALSO 10/13?!?! And remember, Ten Thirteen Productions was the production company for the show.

So thank you, Writer/Director/Producer Chris Carter. You officially made me into a nerd.

And thank you, Aviarians, for reading.


Don't Make a "Truth" Joke, Don't Make a "Truth" Joke, Don't Make...

I give it two weeks.

Monday, June 25, 2007

[Insert Meerkat Pun]

Me and Andy have returned! And I promise I'll never leave your side again (at least until mid-July)!

Friday, June 22, 2007

OurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrRRRrrrrr Kinda World

As a gift for you guys before our vacation this weekend, I plundered an article from this'ere arrrrticle.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Kai-Roast X? XI? MMVII?

Taking yet another vacation... but this time Andy and I will actually be somewhere! We're going for a spiritual/scatological humor recharge up at an undisclosed retreat in deep woods Wisconsin. I dare you to try to stop us.

Cheers, and we'll be back with some majorly nice stuff when we get back.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Barry '08 Campaign Beginning!

When it comes to politics, we can't forget that Dave Barry is running in 2008, and he's a candidate better than Ron Paul, Bill Richardson, Barack Obama, Mitt Romney, and Adolf Hitler combined. Plus, he's an independent!

Labels: ,

Monday, June 18, 2007

THAT'S Why Pritzker Has His Name Everywhere?!

My only real interest in keeping Hillary Clinton out of the White House is to keep out a Northsider who turned to the Yankees.

Will Park Ridge, Chicago, and the rest of Illinois do the same?

(I really have no serious gripes with Hillary except the "former Chicagoan/Yankees Fan" thing. It's disgraceful.)


5 Million Tons of Fried Rice!

I TOLD you to watch Robot Chicken.

(This link provided by Alex. For other links, once this one gets taken down, ask Google!)

Sunday, June 17, 2007


Empire on Ice. That's all I have to say.

Go watch Robot Chicken: Star Wars.

Half-Ass or Whole-Ass Post

Happy Father's (Father's?) Day! I hope all my peers reading this right now have avoided that scourge!

Saturday, June 16, 2007

For Posterity

Yeah, this's pretty much what would happen to me, too.

(Posting this link from a link in Comments from Alex. It's for posterity (in case my comment archives get wiped someday, which happens at times.)

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Waitwaitwait... "Cannibal-Fixated"?!

Countering my last post, scientists in Britain are prudes.

(From FARK.com.)

Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry, the Fab Two

They're absolutely bloody excellent.

(Sorry for breaking my own code a few times recently. I prefer to post videos here as links and not as embedded objects... it's just easier.)

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Maybe Mecha Daley's Involved

Remember that really scary piece of technology I was showing off about a week ago?

Here's a trial of it.

(Because it's designed by Microsoft, the trial only seems to work with Internet Explorer. Hope you have it!)

From Richard Jurassic Daley to Richard Mecha Daley

Being a Chicagoan, this is the play I'd really love to see.

It's about Jurassic Daley, not Mecha.

Monday, June 11, 2007

More on Ron Paul

Correction: Ron Paul is a Congressman, not a senator. We at the Aviary apologize for this screwup.


Doesn't he seem almost reasonable?


Politics, I Guess

So far, my political machine (it's the big washing machine connected by a series of tubes to a refridgerator and broom in my basement) has barely heated up, but the debates have been going on anyway.

There are the obvious candidates, Hillary, McCain, Guiliani, and Obama. While I mildly support them, those who know me know I love dark horses, and as the Internet knows, Bill Richardson and Ron Paul are as black as they come.

Bill Richardson is a New Mexican governor running for the Democratic nomination. He is also the only candidate, of the GOP or Dems, mind you, that has the support of the NRA. He's a very moderate, almost conservative, Democrat, though he also has the most experience in elected office of any Democratic candidate. He also is one of the major Democrats who were against the Iraq war before it began, something he certainly isn't exploiting for political gain.

On an extra note: Obama's not the only half-minority running: Richardson is half Mexican... making him New Mexican, I think.

Ron Paul is a Keebler elf Republican candidate and Texas senator. While a virtual no-name in most national polls, he enjoys more Internet support than the Numa Numa guy at this point: only Obama is matching him. Why is that? The man is a principled libertarian and what most call a true conservative, one looking to pare down the federal government. Example: he refused to vote Rosa Parks a Congressional Medal of Honor, saying it was unconstitutional to spend taxes on such things. He then offered $100 out of his own pocket to pay for the medal. He promises to use his veto power a lot.

I think he'd veto his own mother.

So, to sum it up, we have a NRA Card-carrying Democrat (not that there's anything WRONG with that) and an elf running. I'm currently hoping for them to make it an awesome November 2008, for my sake.

P.S. Here's something very poignant from the last GOP debate/stolen off of YouTube/really stolen from Real Time with Bill Maher.


Long, Awesome Weekend

Andy got himself out of jury duty, got himself to BluesFest and Printer's Row (getting plenty of free stuff and some good cheap books including a signed book by Victor Borge!) three days this weekend, and refereed a game of Capture the Flag on Sunday! He was so tired at the end of it all.

Hope he wakes up sometime within the next week.

Chicago IS Wonderful

Sorry for the long break, but it's been a busy four days! Chicago was absolutely alive with BluesFest, Printer's Row Book Fair, and a major game of Capture the Flag in Oak Park (Ignatian-run).

I will write later about all that, but for now, I will simply post the coolest animal scientific name ever: Alligator mississippiensis, the American Alligator.

(Found at Cute Overload.)

Wednesday, June 06, 2007


Normally, I don't let Stephen Colbert do my talking, but this begs to be posted.

How Many More Sports Screw Ups Can I Find This Week?

Have you seen the London Olympic logo? Someone paid more than $12.95 for that? Ages 3-9?

Also... epilepsy?!?!?!

And the Swiss Guard Does Nothing!

No, seriously, watch the video. The one Swiss Guard does nothing!

Aaron Greater Than Bonds

I suppose Chicago and Asheville aren't the only places getting their share of black eyes in sports.


Tuesday, June 05, 2007

What's Next? A Machine that Washes and Dries Your Clothes?

It really is a day for technology to screw with my head.

(Spotted on AICN.)

Chicago Sports Are a Wet Dream Right Now...

...to satirists.

I was actually at the Cubs game, only about 20 or so rows from the field, where teammates Michael Barrett and Carlos Zambrano fought. I barely saw it, but still, I consider myself proud to have witnessed such a beautiful and honorable moment in Chicago sports history.

Manager Lou Piniella, the next game, probably totally not thinking at all about the game the day before, exploded. He kicked dirt all over the ump and grabbed the ump's arm, apparently. He is suspended four games without access to beaches, gardens, and dirt roads. His consolation prize is a new hat.

The White Sox are... well... I really don't know. Ozzie's still managing and not being hunted by the NAACP, right?

The Bears' Tank Johnson got out of jail, finally. The Chicago papers released the list of junk food he ate in jail. Thankfully, they did this "on the way in" and not "on the way out."

However, for all our woes, I still found a video to cheer us all up.



I have no idea what he says, but I'm sure it's good!

(Link credit: Larke.)

Monday, June 04, 2007

It Took Four Years?!?!

I wrote this a while back (mostly just after my class graduated), and due to Ignatius graduating right now, I figured now's as good as any time to post it.

    The Things It Took Me Four Years to Learn at St. Ignatius
    By Andy Dost '04

  1. The wood underneath the wooden staircases seriously is never used. And some of it is arsenic-treated.

  2. Administrators mostly like to know your name only if you've done something important to them, like give them money besides tuition.

  3. Darryl's last name.

  4. The "Up" and "Down" staircases are really just suggestions, except when the Deans and certain strict teachers are around. We all know which teachers.

  5. There's something called the Grad-at-Grad, which I've forgotten by now. I'm sure it wasn't all that important to follow anyway.

  6. What side to put your tassel on before and then after you've accepted your diploma at graduation. This was also forgotten.

  7. Which chairs are okay to nap in at the library: the ones Mr. Juliard could not see when he made his rounds.

  8. Anyone can name a Latin teacher and a Spanish teacher or two, but can anyone but a French student name any of the French teachers' names?

  9. We all missed pep assemblies, but with newspapers or tennis balls banned, what would've been the point?

  10. Joe Pacold is, contrary to all evidence, human and not a robot.

  11. It's tough to remember to tuck in a polo shirt, but once you're in college, it's tough to remember not to.

  12. Why the administration took away the Walk... wait, no... still don't know that one...

  13. While on a stage, chairs are very breakable when enough Work (Force times Distance) is applied.

  14. Prom is not too hard to crash. Right, Alex?

  15. There is this pair of jeans in the top room of the lightroom in the McLaughlin Theatre, there between my freshman year and senior year. I'll bet they're still there.

  16. How hot nights are at the Jackhammer!

  17. Squirrels disappear when they escape into the dining hall. Where they end up, no one knows, but I've never seen one leave. Bosco Stick, anyone?

  18. Certain schools are not meant to play football. Or baseball. Or any sports. Mostly they should just program calculators and buy stocks.

  19. I can get away with ethnic jokes in Baccalaureate mass speeches.

  20. There's a guy waiting in the Al's parking lot waiting to supply you with whatever you need. Ask for Vito.

In other Ignatius news, the Sun-Times just hit the admin pretty hard with a frontpage story (which I'm sure a lot of Iggians have heard already).

Apparently the admin didn't learn as much in 40 years as I learned in four.

I Keep Following the "Strange But True Headlines" Links!

If You Wanted to Get Your Point Across to Puppy Eaters Everywhere

It's a job well done!


Were There Cicadas in LOTR?

The New Zealanders are paying attention to our plight.


Birdwatchers Suck

I had to steal this from Dave.


Sunday, June 03, 2007

Zombie Movie I Can Get Behind