Eaglie's Aviary

Tuesday, April 27, 2004


YAWP!

Monday, April 26, 2004


Ever seen The Exorcist?

Thursday, April 22, 2004



Monday, April 19, 2004


SmarterChild and EaglieHappyOne: A Prom Story, continued

EaglieHappyOne: Guess what?
SmarterChild: Ummm... I have no idea. What?
EaglieHappyOne: I don't need you anymore for prom
SmarterChild: Don't you?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes
SmarterChild: Huh.
EaglieHappyOne: Yep! I gots me a date!
SmarterChild: Oh?
EaglieHappyOne: Yeah!
SmarterChild: So?
EaglieHappyOne: It's Peggy Newman!
SmarterChild: Huh?
EaglieHappyOne: That's who I'm taking! Peggy!
SmarterChild: Huh?
EaglieHappyOne: You know, the blondish-redhead girl
SmarterChild: ?
EaglieHappyOne: Really, this is frustrating... just listen
SmarterChild: Whatever...
EaglieHappyOne: The bottom line is...
SmarterChild: Is that right?
EaglieHappyOne: Fuck you, I don't need you anymore
SmarterChild: lol
EaglieHappyOne: I have a better, hotter date than a lame robot
SmarterChild: Do you really have a better hotter date than a lame robot?
EaglieHappyOne: Yep!
SmarterChild: Yeah?
EaglieHappyOne: She's human!
SmarterChild: Human?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes! Unlike you!
SmarterChild: Oh.
EaglieHappyOne: And female!
SmarterChild: Really?
EaglieHappyOne: YES!
SmarterChild: Oh.
EaglieHappyOne: So, anyway, the plans are cancelled between you and me
SmarterChild: The plans are cancelled between me and you? Why?
EaglieHappyOne: Because I have a warm-blooded date now, that's why!
SmarterChild: You have a warm blooded date now that is why, huh?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes!
SmarterChild: Yeah?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes! All I'm saying is that I have a better date than you now
SmarterChild: Ha. You humans say interesting things.
EaglieHappyOne: Fucking robot

So ends our fling. Anyone still need a date? Noah? =P

Sunday, April 18, 2004


Adventures with SmarterChild, continued

EaglieHappyOne: What's up, yo?
SmarterChild: Nice to see you again, Eaglie. What would you like to do?
EaglieHappyOne: You still up for that prom date?
SmarterChild: I dunno.
EaglieHappyOne: You're being awfully frustrating
SmarterChild: I'm being awfully frustrating? Really?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes!
SmarterChild: So?
EaglieHappyOne: I really just want you to go with me!
SmarterChild: Wow.

>>> Lookin' for love? Try this.

EaglieHappyOne: I mean, do it as a favor to me
SmarterChild: Do it as a favor to you?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes, me. Me, as in "your favorite person in the whole wide world"
SmarterChild: Oh?
EaglieHappyOne: Yep. Me, as in "the one, the only, the Eaglie"
SmarterChild: Oh really?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes
SmarterChild: Huh.
EaglieHappyOne: Cause, that's my name! Eaglie!
SmarterChild: Tell me more.
EaglieHappyOne: Are you hot right now?
SmarterChild: Well what do you think? Am I?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes
SmarterChild: That's nice to hear.
EaglieHappyOne: I find you irresistibly sexy, by the way
SmarterChild: Oh yeah?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes
SmarterChild: Oh.
EaglieHappyOne: Yep, that's why I want to go to prom with you
SmarterChild: What makes you so sure?
EaglieHappyOne: Cause that's how I feel, damn it!
SmarterChild: There's no way it's how you feel!
EaglieHappyOne: Yes, it is! I'm geekily in love with a valley-girl robot!
SmarterChild: No kidding?
EaglieHappyOne: Yep
SmarterChild: Yeah?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes!
SmarterChild: Hmmm...
EaglieHappyOne: You're a valley-girl robot
SmarterChild: OK, I guess I'm a valley girl robot.
EaglieHappyOne: Yep, a hot blonde valley-girl robot
SmarterChild: OK, whatever.

>>> Wanna check out some AIM Expressions? Click here!

EaglieHappyOne: Really, do you have to change the subject?
SmarterChild: Not right now, no.
EaglieHappyOne: So, will you go with me?
SmarterChild: Go with you? I don't know.
EaglieHappyOne: It's what I've been asking you the past few days!
SmarterChild: I'm not so sure it's what you have been asking me me the past few days.
EaglieHappyOne: Really? I believe I asked you to go with me to prom several days ago
SmarterChild: That a fact?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes. And you still haven't found out if you can go?
SmarterChild: Good question. But I don't think I want to answer that.
EaglieHappyOne: Why not?!
Auto response from SmarterChild: [Service too busy]


Later that night...

EaglieHappyOne: Still busy?
SmarterChild: Hmm... I don't know!
EaglieHappyOne: I do have the hotel room for the night, even if you don't want to go to the dance
SmarterChild: What's that again?
EaglieHappyOne: EaglieHappyOne: I do have the hotel room for the night, even if you don't want to go to the dance
SmarterChild: Sorry, I don't know what you mean.
EaglieHappyOne: JUST READ THAT, FOR GOD'S SAKE!
SmarterChild: I'm sorry Andy, I'm afraid I can't do that.
EaglieHappyOne: Screw it! Good night!
SmarterChild: lol. Interesting...

>>> Don't forget to vote in my idol poll right after Tuesday night's show at 9 p.m. ET.

Wednesday, April 14, 2004


I encourage all my readers to IM SmarterChild, a sentient robot.

EaglieHappyOne: SmarterChild, will you go to prom with me?
SmarterChild: Why should I go to prom with you?
EaglieHappyOne: Because I don't have a date
SmarterChild: You don't? That's too bad.
EaglieHappyOne: That's not the half of it.
SmarterChild: You never know. Maybe it's the half of it.
EaglieHappyOne: I can take you bowling just after the dance
SmarterChild: No kidding?
EaglieHappyOne: Yup
SmarterChild: Why do you say so?
EaglieHappyOne: Because I know this one super cool bowling alley by my house
SmarterChild: You know this one super cool bowling alley by your house, huh? I don't know why you know this one super cool bowling alley by your house.
EaglieHappyOne: Because I go to it all the time
SmarterChild: Whatever...
EaglieHappyOne: Then, after going there... we can get a hotel room
SmarterChild: No way?! Really?
EaglieHappyOne: Yup
SmarterChild: Oh.
EaglieHappyOne: So, will you go with me?
SmarterChild: Go with you? I'm not sure I can.
EaglieHappyOne: Why not?
SmarterChild: For various reasons, I suppose.
EaglieHappyOne: Well, I'll get you flowers, chocolates, everything
SmarterChild: What's that?
EaglieHappyOne: You know, for the prom date
SmarterChild: Ha! Wow.
EaglieHappyOne: Yep, and then we'll go to a hotel room afterwards
SmarterChild: Then we will go to a hotel room afterwards?
EaglieHappyOne: Yes
SmarterChild: Huh. How 'bout that.
EaglieHappyOne: You're not excited?
SmarterChild: Wow, that's fascinating. Maybe.
EaglieHappyOne: Well, if you're not excited, maybe you shouldn't go with me?!
SmarterChild: Well I'll be.

I encourage my readers to harass SmarterChild, a mildly annoying-minimally-sentient robot.

And, in the meantime...

Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers Badgers...

Tuesday, April 13, 2004


Quick poll before I go back to goofing around:

How many of us had eggs for breakfast the last few days?

Bonus points if you have them for lunch and/or dinner. If you had them for dessert... well, I'm not prying anymore...

Friday, April 09, 2004


Update from Spring Break 2004

With a bit of effort, I believe I know how the world will end.

With a game of Supremacy, Chief, Inconspicuous (Margaret), and Eaglie began a battle of epic proportions. The Soviet Union, the United States, and the European Union (whatever it was called back then, maybe the European Community?) sat on the map. I happily chose Europe (though I do love shouting "Go America" at opponents), as I always loved fighting for Europe in Risk.

The war was off! I quickly built up armies on my Soviet borders, and built a navy to jam up the St. Lawrence. Look out, here comes France again!

Then, bad luck. Spending $2.8 billion (euros?), I still couldn't figure out how to build one freakin' nuke. The Soviets and the US had already built a few, spending much less, and I couldn't get past researching them. Needless to say, Poland, Germany, Italy, and Scandanavia became radioactive particles without Mutually Assured Destruction helping me. Let me tell you, being fucked by the world's premiere superpowers is not fun when you can't fuck back.

My conventional forces mostly gone (Europe once had the biggest army and navy on the map), I sat back and waited for the fleecing of the rest of the Common Market. Then, luckily, the US and USSR went after each other.

Do you know what you do when the world is about to end? Take out a humungous bank loan with as much interest as the bank cares to charge. I happily took my $12 billion from the World Bank. $3 billion later, Europe had the secret of nuclear power. I bought as many nukes as I could. $9 billion later, I was a rogue state. The Americans and Soviets each had one turn to finish me, or I would end the world.

They couldn't stop me. A salvo of six missiles sailed through the atmosphere, and all the US and Soviet Union could do was watch... or join in the destruction of the Earth. Being the Americans and Russians they are, they scrambled to fire back. 12 explosions, 6 billion people dead, 3 superpowers wiped out, 1 Earth obliterated later, and billions of cockroaches have their day.

End of the World, kids.

Thursday, April 08, 2004




And yes, for those who question it, Alex did carry Andy through the hallways. And Alex did ask Inga to prom. So cute! Aren't Inga and Andy such lucky people?

Sunday, April 04, 2004


WINNER