Eaglie's Aviary

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

American Exceptionalisms to Soccer

American exceptionalism: we take exception to the game of soccer. When the World Cup kicked off last Friday, I figured something out: there is something distinctly un-American about soccer. We Americans like scores. We like close-ups. We like tackling without sliding. We like funny commercials. Ad companies (i.e. Americans) like funny commercials. Let's see:

___ Scoring
___ Close-ups of awesome action during the game
___ Tackling (without sliding)
___ Funny commercials, maybe involving a cute baby
___ Americans winning

No checks. Soccer fails this list miserably, so most Americans aren't going to like soccer very soon. The ones that will aren't me.

But, hey! USA tied a game with England last Saturday! We might do pretty well in this bracket! Go Team USA! Beat Slovenia and Algeria next! And go Soccer! WOOOOO! BUUZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!

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