Eaglie's Aviary

Friday, February 19, 2010

Rumor Is the German One's Biathletic!

Germany and the U.S. are in a tight medal count race up and to the left in Vancouver. They are also in a tight race involving hot ladies dressed in super-hot leotards. Sure, there's plenty to show off of the men's muscles for curling stones and shoving sleds (who are also dressed in leotards), but this is the women's time to shine. This is the biennial time attention is paid to women's sports. Make it worth our time, competitors! Some writers at Esquire have deadlines! (Metromix was also happy to show us the goods, but they threw a few men in. How quaint!)

The Germans are led by Magdalena Neuner. She picked up silver in Women's 7.5 km Sprint, whatever that means. And she picked up gold in Women's 10 km Pursuit, whatever that means. But the point is, she did it while being hot. So did a few other German girls the past eight days, and none of them have worn push-up dirndl to do it! You can't buy that kind of talent.

The American lineup of cheesecake is iced with ladies like Lindsey Vonn, Julia Mancuso, and Tanith Belbin. All are lovely and medal winners. Or are soon-to-be medal winners. They aren't Picabo Street, I know, but no one has a name that awesome anymore.

And the U.S. and Germany aren't the only countries capable of producing women! China has its young lineup of speedskaters, and Canada has a surprising number of lookers, even with all the poutine and maple syrup. So many lovely, hot ladies, all in leotards and tight snow gear! Well, almost all, which is why no one likes women's hockey.

But these fem-athletes are all supremely talented, of course. They should be valued for their strategies and competitiveness--their intelligence and sportspersonship above all else. Now let the cheering and cat-calling continue!

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