Wednesday, October 15, 2008
A boring title, no? But that's all the creativity we at the Aviary can afford right now in this economy! About it, though: Blog Action Day is a set day that we in the Blogosphere get responsible one day and not talk about three-headed kittens or Sarah Palin. We are here to make a difference after all.
Poverty is a massive theme to tackle. Most people might talk about it in grand gestures and arm-flailing, and others do shadow puppets of specifics. Spoken in drama, comedy, fiscal quarterly reports... personally, I like playwriting. Therefore, I present to you a scene from my new work (coming to Broadway and a Tony Awards show near you), Poverty: Maybe Obama County!
Investment Banker 1: We need money!
Investment Banker 2: Much more than expected!
Treasury Secretary: It will all collapse otherwise, Mr. President!
President: (thinks) They do need money!
Investment Banker 1: Yes!
Investment Banker 2: Always!
President: Give it to them!
Congressman 1: But, well, I guess we must... for the good of the nation... we might bankrupt the nation though...
Congressman Chorus: We will save it!
Congressman 1: We might give away all our money to Wall Street fatcats, instead of helping all those people losing their houses...
Congressman Chorus: Not the CEOs, this time!
Congressman 1: We will have to tighten our belts and get rid of all the pork...
Congressman Chorus: Pork must go! Bailout, here we come!
Congressman 2: Isn't this socialism?
Congressman Chorus: (silence)
Speaker of the House: All for saving of this horribly managed economy, entirely the fault of Mr. President and not at all us, many of whom have been in our seats for more years than Mr. President has been Mr. President? What do we vote?
Congressman Chorus: Nay! Nay to socialism!
$700 Billion: Don't I have a say in this?
Congressman Chorus: Nay!
Senator 1: Well, I don't know about overstepping my bounds and putting up a financial bill...
Senator 2: We must save this nation!
Senator 3: We must save this nation, my friends, even if it means putting off a debate or two with that one of the most important election of our lifetime!
Female Governor: You betcha, Senator 3!
Evil President of the Senate: What do we vote then?
Senator Chorus: Aye!
$700 Billion: Jeez, don't I have a say in this?
Senator Chorus: Nay!
Evil President of the Senate: Motion aborted!
Female Governor: No!
Scene 3 (this is where the drama really picks up)
$700 Billion: I just don't know who I am anymore. No one cares how I feel about being a big talking pile of money.
Congressman 1: Huge.
$700 Billion: Nobody knows... (sobs)
Senator 2: Well, why don't you go out there and help everyone out? Save us all?
Senator 3: Make people's lives better. Like we try to, every day, no matter how stupid, insane, and gangly our opponents are.
Senator 2: Or how irascible, bad-tempered, and smelly.
Senator 3: Or how much they will lead us into another destructive war abroad.
Senator 2: Or how much they will destroy this country through insidious means within.
Senator 3: Or how much we will never insult our opponents' character.
Senator 2: Or how much I have to agree with Senator 3.
$700 Billion: Think I could?
Senator 2: Yes, you can.
Senator 3: Act first, before it's too late!
$700 Billion: You mean, like all these jokes?
That's what I have so far, but I still need names. I was thinking Clinton and Romney for Senators 2 and 3.